tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-43179863253091089222024-03-21T19:42:21.321-04:00Moni Life - Feng Shui and More...Articles about Feng Shui, Healthy Food Preparation, Zumba Fitness, Graphic and Web Design, Energy Healing, Children...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-221089706505363112013-07-27T11:25:00.000-04:002013-07-27T14:57:20.921-04:00<h2>
What I Learned from a Mass Shooting at My Church</h2>
On July 27 of 2008, a lone gunman entered the sanctuary of the church my
family and I usually attended. He was carrying a shotgun with the barrel
cut off, hidden in a guitar case, and managed to get three shots out
before five fathers and grandfathers in the congregation submitted him
and took the weapon away from him.<br />
<br />
<h3>
Miracles Happen </h3>
Five years ago, on that day, I had irrefutable proof that miracles do happen.<br />
<br />
On the weeks and months following the shooting there were multiple mentions of the phrase "line of fire." I didn't understand what it meant in the beginning, thinking that it referred to the people closest to the shooter. What it actually meant was the fan like pattern that the pellets in the shotgun followed in their trajectory, including their reach to the exit door at the back of the sanctuary.<br />
<br />
That morning there was no regular service, but a children's play – the culmination of a summer camp that had been held at the church. All the children, who on any other day would have been at the opposite wing of the building in the religious education area, were in the sanctuary, yet not a single child was physically hurt.<br />
<br />
There were plenty of children in the "line of fire." Some were sitting on the laps or right next to a parent who was injured, yet not a single pellet reached a child. What are the chances of that?<br />
<br />
Miracles happen.<br />
<br />
<h3>
The Meaning of Aftermath</h3>
You always hear on the news, after a terrible tragedy is mentioned, the words "and its aftermath." I never really understood what these words meant until this tragedy hit so close to home.<br />
<br />
I never knew that the events of one day – mind you, the shooting took less than a minute – could create so far reaching effects. Several people whose health was already compromised, especially the elderly, left their bodies as if in a domino effect in the next few weeks after the event. I remember a friend mentioned how his heart sank when he had to dress up for yet another funeral – the sixth in a period of two weeks.<br />
<br />
I saw beautiful couples, who still loved each other, divorce. People who had always been fit, inexplicably gain weight. And of course, an increased incidence of illness and surgeries.<br />
<br />
Every so often, we hear of one more person who has become unable to work. There are pains so great we can't event talk about them.<br />
<br />
There is this silent anxiety lurking in the depths of our consciousness that may probably only go away when every one of the children who was there that day shows evidence of being a happy and healthy adult.<br />
<br />
<h3>
<b>Evil People Do Exist</b></h3>
Before this happened, whenever I heard in the news that yet one more "nutjob" had done something crazy-evil, like a school shooting, I always assumed the people in question must be crazy themselves. Not so after the unfortunate reading of the gunman's "suicide letter." Here was a person with full use of his capacities, who chose to, day after day, feed his mind and heart with hatred. A person who could even explain his reasons coherently right before he set out to open fire a in a room full of children. <br />
<br />
After that, I had to admit that some people who are in full use of their mental capacities simply choose to do evil.<br />
<br />
<h3>
<b>It is Good to Listen to the Inner Voice</b></h3>
I had promised myself that I would take the children to see the play at the church that day, and that we would be, not only on time, but early.<br />
<br />
However, that morning things didn't go as planned. My husband was running late and told me to go ahead with the kids and he would meet us there later. When I was picking up the boys' lunchbox that he had prepared, I heard this soft, gentle, loving voice that said, "It is more important to be together as a family, than to be on time."<br />
<br />
I listened. We arrived at the parking lot of the church exactly three minutes after the shooting, right after the first police car. <br />
<br />
Pay attention to the inner voice.<br />
<br />
<h3>
<b>Bad Memories Can Be Overwritten</b></h3>
The gunman carried his shotgun hidden in a guitar case. It is natural that from then on the sight of a guitar case, or even a guitar, could bring up fear and other negative emotions, especially among the children in the congregation.<br />
<br />
A special service was designed to reclaim the guitar case and the guitar as instruments of creation and not of destruction. At the end, the minister walked down the hallway where the shooter set up, playing the guitar and singing with the children. <br />
<br />
That day I learned that bad memories are recordings in a cassette tape, that can be overwritten by simply recording a better memory on top of that one – no need to erase first.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-32404707279750822552013-04-27T19:36:00.002-04:002013-04-27T20:20:03.621-04:00<h2>
<b>A Feng Shui Journey to Self-Acceptance </b></h2>
I recently read a post on Facebook that said that the way parents talk to their children becomes their "inner talk." I agree with this statement.<br />
<br />
It has taken me many years of healing therapies to learn to talk to myself in a way that is loving and nourishing -- unlike the way my parents talked to me or about me.<br />
<br />
My father was constantly ashamed of me. In his own words, he was ashamed to learn he had had a daughter (not man enough to produce a second son instead), he was ashamed to see that my skin was olive and not the rosy pink of my brother's, and he was ashamed months later when the dark baby hair fell off and was replaced by brown hair -- instead of blonde.<br />
<br />
As I grew up, he was ashamed that I was not athletic, and he was ashamed that I got good grades. He was mortified that I was not skinny, and embarrassed because I was shy. My good grades, he said, made my brother look bad, and made him fear that I would never find a husband. <br />
<br />
As I grew older he found more reasons to feel shame, like the acne on my face, or the slightly downwards turn of the corners of my mouth that revealed the native South American ancestry he would have liked to deny.<br />
<br />
When I was offered the equivalence of a valedictorian he tried to make me refuse it. He was glaringly absent from my graduation from high school, and didn't even bother to get out of bed the day I graduated as an Architect. <br />
<br />
Nothing I did could get good feedback from him. For example, when I was 24, the first short story I wrote won the third prize on a national short story contest, which came with a considerable cash prize. Instead of feeling pride, he felt deep embarrassment over one sentence in the story which he declared as "suggestive."<br />
<br />
Throughout my life, I felt like my father had pre-decided to disapprove of me and anything I did. It was almost as if he had decided to dislike me the day he learned of my conception, and from then on stayed true to his purpose. My mother just went along with anything he said. <br />
<br />
I don't know what would have become of me if I hadn't also had a grandmother and aunt who did the exact opposite. They adored me and approved of anything I said or did. I was the spark in their lives and I know for a fact <b>that they pre-decided to love me and approve of me on the very day they learned of my existence</b> in the womb. Being a girl was an added bonus for them, since they already had a grandson/nephew, my gender only completed their happiness. I was always sure to be welcomed at their place, never denied a hug, constantly told how wonderful I was and how much they loved me. When a friend who had known me for years met them, she told me, "Now I understand why you turned out so well. God may take something away with one hand, while giving to you with the other hand."<br />
<br />
However, it is not the voices of grandparents or aunts and uncles that become our inner voice, but the voice of our parents. I have done a lot of work over these issues over time. Now I am ready to make a quantum leap in my self-acceptance. Will you make one as well?<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: red;">How does the voice of your parents' criticism show up in your daily life?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: red;"><br />How can you create a new script for your inner talk? One that is healthy and rooted on that immeasurable self-worth that comes to you from the simple fact of being a spiritual being?</span></b><br />
<br />
These are the questions we explore in the Feng Shui Journey for Self Acceptance. To come with me and other like-minded people on this journey, all you have to do is join the Facebook group and commit to making very small changes at home during the next seven weeks. <b>It's free!</b> <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/572941289407129/" target="_blank">Click here</a> to go to the Facebook group. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-80856372523576185652012-08-26T18:26:00.001-04:002012-08-26T18:26:17.047-04:00When Career and Life Mission Don't Match<b>Our chosen career</b> is what we do for a living – in other words the kind of work that we do in order to get money.<br />
<br />
<b>Our life mission</b> is that which we are meant to do – the task or tasks that we came to accomplish in this life time.<br />
<br />
As I have written before, when I first started my Feng Shui career I used to believe that the two needed to go together in order for a person to be truly fulfilled. After the financial collapse at the end of 2008, though, I saw that my clients who had more than one skill to "fall back on" where the ones that adapted better to the rapid economic changes. I saw then that there is an inherent value in having a job or a career that allows us to contribute to our society and in exchange get enough income to live in a way that all our needs and at least some of our desires are met.<br />
<br />
During the financial collapse I also saw people who were very skilled, and had more than one skill, but who had been "ruined" by their belief in New Age teachings and books that claimed that any person should be able to manifest their ideal job at any time, if they desired it strongly enough and raised their vibration high enough. These people rejected job offers that would have allowed them to make a good living because they were not for work that was aligned with their dream career and/or sense of life mission. A couple of these people I know ended up being evicted from their homes and having to file for bankruptcy. <br />
<br />
I now believe that for most people life mission and career don't come together. Sometimes, they aren't even in the same field of work, and most of the time this is not a problem. However, when a person's career is in opposition to their life mission, I have seen people express deep dissatisfaction and engage in self-sabotaging behavior.<br />
<br />
To illustrate this point let me give you two examples:<br />
<br />
<b>Client A</b> is a woman who is a healer and a Reiki master and believes in the healing power of the human body and soul. She herself avoids taking medication, and she uses herbal remedies as the first recourse when she or a family member are feeling ill. Client A works for a pharmaceutical company.<br />
<br />
<b>Client B</b> is also a woman who is a healer and a Reiki master, and just like Client A, she uses herbs and other natural therapies to tend to her healing needs and those of her loved ones. Client B is a nurse.<br />
<br />
Both women would describe their life missions as "Increasing awareness in the larger community about alternative and complementary therapies." <b>Client A</b> is very unhappy. She has a positive attitude and uses a very disciplined spiritual regime to keep from plunging into depression. She manages most of the time, but at a great energetic cost. Hard as she might try, her alternative healing ventures do not succeed. From time to time, her health suffers.<br />
<br />
<b>Client B</b>, on the other hand, is very happy and healthy. Notice that both women work for institutions that promote conventional medical care as their main job, and have healing practices on the side. Moreover, both women feel that conventional medicine is something that is contrary to their life mission. So why is one of the women very unhappy, while the other one is very happy?<br />
<br />
<b>Client B</b> noticed a long time ago that what is usually called "health care" is really only "sick care," in the sense that all their treatments are based on drugs, surgery and radiation, to control illnesses that have already manifested in a person's system, while very little effort is made to foster health so that most people would not need "health care." When she was confronted with this realization, she quite her job at a hospital and took some time to try and do healing full time. She did well for a while until – you guessed it – the financial crisis of 2008. <b>Client B </b>took some time off to search her soul and find where she could fit in the apparatus of conventional medical care where she would feel that she was not betraying herself and her life mission. She finally went to work doing hospice care, where she could offer compassionate care to people at the end of their lives, as well as to their loved ones. Thus, she is able to provide for the needs of her family, while staying true to her life mission. <b>Client A</b>, on the other hand, works directly helping people get medication which she believes may be doing more harm than good. (Please notice that I am not making any judgement regarding the effectiveness of conventional medicine or alternative therapies, I am simply presenting the views of the two women in the example.)<br />
<br />
So what can <b>Client A</b> do?<br />
<br />
1. She can recognize the value of having a job that pays her bills, even if it is not her dream job, and if it is in opposition to her life mission. She can also start actively looking for another job, while continuing to work at her present job. The new job doesn't have to be in alignment with her life mission, but it ought not to be in opposition to it.<br />
<br />
2. Client A can also change her Life Mission, or the part of her Life Mission which she describes as promoting alternative and complementary healing techniques. It can be done. Some spiritual healers would make you belief that Life Missions cannot be changed or moved, but that is not true. You can truly let go of a Life Mission – other times people realize that what they thought was their Life Mission was actually a simple belief that something needed to be done and that they should be the ones to do it. <br />
<br />
There is no greater value in choosing either option, but she needs to make a choice. A person's soul cannot be divided for a long time without seeing some negative effect. Most people who have actually connected with their true Life Mission or Missions, however, tend to decide to pursue them, because of their own strong desire to go in that direction, more than from a sense of obligation. A sense of obligation, on the other hand, can often be a sign that the perceived "Life Mission" is actually an idea that was picked up from sources other than the person's soul.<br />
<br />
Dr. Susana Kronfeld, practitioner of Traditional Chinese Medicine and a good friend of mine has designed a healing poem to help people re-align with their life mission. You do not have to purchase the poster, just work with the thumbnail below or simply memorize the words. If you feel you benefit from the poem after a few days, consider purchasing the poster, which contains healing frequencies by healer and artist Bill Austin. When we "put our money where our beliefs are" we give more power to our creative powers. :) Click on the <a href="http://www.cafepress.com/fengshuicures.437935234" target="_blank">Sky Blue</a> for more info on purchasing the poster:<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.cafepress.com/fengshuicures.437935234" target="_blank"><img alt="Healing Poem Mini Poster Print" border="0" class="templateimage defaultimageborder" id="mainimg" name="mainimg" src="http://i1.cpcache.com/product/437935234/healing_poem_posters.jpg?height=240&width=240" /> Healing Poem</a></div>
<br />
<br />
It is likely that the words in this poster don't make a lot of sense to you, but they are very powerful. This poem was designed from a deep knowledge of how the five elements (water, wood, fire, earth and metal) work and how they interact with the three levels of existence: Heaven (thoughts), Earth (physical action), and Humankind (emotions). Art, like poetry, can sometimes achieve amazing transformations in the human soul. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-45421996664027305062012-07-17T18:38:00.000-04:002012-07-22T21:15:33.661-04:00Listening to the Voice of Love - Remembering July 27, 2008I wrote this shortly after the shooting of July 27, 2008 at the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist church. Our family was supposed to be there that morning, but we only made it after the first cop arrived at the scene.<br />
<br />
I wrote about how banana pancakes and my husband being tardy saved us from a direct exposure to the horrors of that day. <br />
<br />
There were things I did not talk about back then, which were important factors in this story. Some I didn't mention because things were too tender, others because I wasn't ready to reveal certain aspects of myself. <br />
<br />
The first thing, which no one but my husband and me have known since then, it that the previous Friday we had a horrible fight, and I spent all Saturday without talking to him. I can count in the fingers of one hand the times in our marriage of 18 years when we haven't talked to each other a whole day. This was one of them. That morning I was still not talking to him, but during breakfast I made an internal shift and started communicating with him again, hence the question of whether he wanted to come to the church with us.<br />
<br />
My plan was to get up that morning, feed the boys a quick breakfast, and then leave to the church without my husband. My plan was thwarted by his decision to get up earlier and make us a nice breakfast.<br />
<br />
The second thing that only a handful of people know, is that I had been beating myself up about not registering my oldest child, then 5, for the musical theater workshop. I knew he wanted to be in it, but I had not done it for purely selfish reasons: I did not feel like driving back and forth for rehearsals. I didn't feel like having to entertain my youngest son, then 2, by myself at church while I waited for the workshop sessions to end. Because of this guilt, I had promised myself that I would take the children to see the show and that we would be there early. I also promised myself that the next year I would register them for the musical theater. (Of course, there was no musical theater workshop the next three years.) If we had been early, as I had planned, the boys and I probably would have been sitting in the line of fire, because that was my favorite side to sit on. <br />
<br />
The third thing, which very few people know, is that I didn't just have the thought that staying together as a family was more important than being on time -- I actually heard a soundless, gentle voice inside my head say exactly that: "It is more important to stay together as a family than it is to be on time." I had "heard" this gentle voice before and always had very good results when I listened to it: it once woke me up to suggest that I register at the school of architecture, which I did. This voice once told me to get off a bus (even though I was only halfway to my destination) and walk to the school of architecture "to check things out." When I got there, I found I was about to miss an important deadline for my graduate thesis. This is also the voice that told me one summer morning in Mississippi: "write a book on Feng Shui."<br />
<br />
I believe this voice came from the collective made up of my guides and angels, my own high self and my own personal connection to God -- which I call my Magnificent Spiritual High Crew. I hadn't shared this before because I feared that my Unitarian Universalist friends would think less of me or take me less seriously if they knew that I believe in guides and angels and that I listen to their advice. <br />
<br />
Here is what I wrote at the time:<br />
<br />
Last
Sunday morning my husband made banana pancakes for breakfast. I was
sitting there admiring the eating capacity of our two boys, 5 and 2, and
how my husband has been increasing the quantities in his recipe over
the months to satisfy their morning hunger and still have some to carry
in their lunch box to go to church. After breakfast I got the kids and
myself ready to go.<br />
<br />
Then I saw my husband walk to the bathroom
saying he was going to shower. We were already running a little bit late
and I was surprised to see he wasn't ready and hadn't even showered
yet. He said, "Why don't you go ahead with the boys and I'll meet you
there later." I agreed, but when I got to the kitchen to fetch their
lunch box with the pancakes I changed my mind, and decided that it was
more important for us to be together as a family on a Sunday morning
than to be on time. I could as easily have left, annoyed at my husband's
tardiness on such a special day as this. You see, I had promised my
kids that I would take them to see the play "Annie Jr." that the
children of our church had put together during summer camp.<br />
<br />
That morning I listened to the voice of love, instead of to the voice of annoyance and I will forever be grateful for it.<br />
<br />
We
got to the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Church in Knoxville, TN at 10:21,
right after the first police car arrived. In fact, the police car
passed us on Kingston Pike and I felt the first pang of fear when I saw
him turn on the driveway to our church. The second pang came when we saw
the officer get out of the car with what looked like a sniper's rifle.
Then a couple of young women told us there had been a shooting and while
I was trying to convince myself this was probably a quarrel or a
burglary, they shouted "people have been shot, you have to leave!"<br />
<br />
At
that time they didn't know that the perpetrator had been submitted and
disarmed by members of the congregation. I am sure you have heard the
rest in the news. <a href="http://www.usatoday.com/news/topstories/2008-07-29-442570771_x.htm">http://www.usatoday.com/news/topstories/2008-07-29-442570771_x.htm</a><br />
<br />
Now that the initial shock is over, I am once
again reminded that there are many things in life that I cannot control,
some over which I don't even have a say, but there are also many things
in my life in which I can make a difference. One of these is my home,
what I put in it and how I take care of it. The care of my home cannot
be separated from the care of my family.<br />
<br />
At times like these it
is even more important that I create a tranquil and loving atmosphere in
our home. We have many friends that were touched by this tragedy in a
variety of degrees. It is important that we stay loving and centered
ourselves so that we can provide support and comfort where needed. This
applies to us adults as well as to our children.Work to make your home
into an embrace of love. Let go of things that you don't use, don't
like, don't love, and those things that are reminders of bad times. Make
sure all the living beings in your home, people, pets and plants are
thriving. Fix what can be fixed, hire help for what you cannot do
yourself.<br />
<br />
Make a plan, budget your time and your resources. Make
sure to leave some time every day to recharge your batteries, to do
something that nourishes you and that you enjoy. These are the basics of
a happy home.And when you need to choose between the voice of love or
the voice of fear, anger or annoyance, always choose the voice of
love. May you be blessed by Feng Shui!<br />
<br />
Monica P. Castaneda<br />
<a href="mailto:monica@fengshuiforus.com" target="_blank">monica@fengshuiforus.com</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-49997472277349047012012-07-14T11:01:00.001-04:002012-07-14T12:40:22.446-04:00A Question to Help You Look Into Your Soul - Life MissionWhen I teach Feng Shui classes or workshops I use a technique to help participants connect with each other and with their own emotions. This technique first asks a question for people to answer to themselves -- write it down if they wish, then share it with the person sitting next to them. Each person talks for a couple of minutes while the other one listens. When every person in each pair has had a chance to confide, then those who choose to get to share their answers with the group.<br />
<br />
One time, back in Iowa, I was teaching a class on the <b><a href="http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/9LifeAreas.html" target="_blank">Nine Life Areas in Feng Shui</a> </b>and we were discussing <b>life area #1: Career, Life Mission and Individuality.</b><br />
<br />
To help participants connect with their own inner sense of their life mission, I asked them to ponder this question:<b> <span style="color: #990000;">"If many years from now you were lying on your death bed, and had the chance to look back at your life, what would be the thing that would hurt the most to know that you didn't do, learn, or accomplish?"</span></b><br />
<br />
It is a very powerful question. I present this question to you now. Take a few minutes to think about it, if you wish to, write down your answers. Then seek a person whom you trust and know that seeks your highest good, and tell them your answer. If they are open to it, have them do the same exercise.<br />
<br />
One of the most interesting answers I heard during that class came from a woman who worked at a bank and was at the time pursuing certification as a Feng Shui consultant. Her answer was that it would hurt tremendously to look back at her life and find out that she didn't dance enough. The reason I find her answer so ineresting is in part that this is something I did not know or expect about her, but also that shortly after she enrolled in ballroom dancing, and later on became a teacher, as well as a Feng Shui consultant. I'd like to think <b>that something shifted inside her that evening as a consequence of pondering this question.</b><br />
<br />
Something else happened that evening. Someone in the class threw the question back at me. I was not prepared for this -- actually I had been avoiding this question for myself. I had to come up with an answer on the spot, and this is what came to me: "I would feel like a failure if I reached the end of my life and was never able to get a handle on my weight, eating and physical strength."<br />
<br />
My own answered surprised me because I would have expected that it would include something about Feng Shui or space arrangement, for which I have great passion. It also surprised me because when I was in my twenties I had already been in control of my weight, my food and my strength. I was living in Quito, Ecuador, almost 10,000 ft above sea level, in the middle of the Andes mountains. Most of my exercise was provided by vigorous walking up and down the hilly streets in my city, the reduced oxygen due to the height added to the demand on my lungs and heart. I ate at the Macrobiotics center <i>The Art of Living</i>, where I met with most of my friends for lunch. We shared some of the most amazing natural foods, prepared in the best ways. Sometimes our lunch meetings lasted up to three hours of animated conversation and laughter. The macrobiotics diet, one if its secrets being that there is never a sugar spike, is designed so that there are no sudden insulin dumps in the bloodstream. It is insulin that gives the signal to the body to convert excess sugar into fat.<br />
<br />
When I moved to the United States, I lost my community and my challenging walks. I was also exposed to lots of food and non-food ingredients that I had not come across before. For example, I did not know about "cheese products," I only knew real cheese. I would get a sinus infection after every single party I attended the first year. I joked with my husband that I must be allergic to parties. We later found out that I had a sensitivity to the yellow coloring used for yellow cheese. I did not know about high fructose corn syrup and the hidden sugars in most crackers and bread. I did not know that eight ounces of bottled fruit juice (one cup) bought in the United States had four times more grams of sugar than the home made juices I was used to drinking back home.<br />
<br />
In short, I gained a lot of weight. For the first time in my life I had to make time for workouts, which I did not enjoy. I found out that even though I had had a handle over weight, food and exercise in my native Ecuador, I had not clue on how to be fit in the United States. <br />
<br />
It took over a decade for me to figure out the ins and outs of nutrition in the US. I learned to do "defensive grocery shopping," I started making my own bread and my own juices. It took me a lot longer to find exercise that I actually liked. What I found, also helped me reconnect with the roots of my original culture and helped reduce home-sickness. If you didn't already guess, I am talking about Zumba®. Now I teach Zumba® and the love for exercise only grows.<br />
<br />
It was through asking and answering this question though, that I discovered that every aspect of this life area: <b style="color: #990000;">Career - Life Mission - Individuality</b> could stand alone. Until then I had believed that all three aspects had to be connected for someone to be truly happy. Through my experience of becoming a Zumba® instructor while continuing to grow my Feng Shui business, and since the financial crisis of 2008, I have also seen in my clients the value of having a job, even if it is not their dream job, or even if it is not aligned with their life mission -- indeed, career and life mission can be separate. <br />
<br />
In my next blog post I will share with you more about life area #1: <b>Career, Life Mission and Individuality</b> and the role each of its aspects has in our lives.<b><br /></b><br />
<br />
In the meantime, you can check these resources in the free learning sections of my site:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/LifeArea1Career.html">http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/LifeArea1Career.html</a><br />
<a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1533337176"><br /></a><br />
<a href="http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/LifeArea1Prints.html">http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/LifeArea1Prints.html</a><br />
<a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1554603419"><br /></a><br />
<a href="http://www.fengshuiforus.com/feng-shui-money.html">http://www.fengshuiforus.com/feng-shui-money.html</a><br />
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Love and Blessings,<br />
<br />
Moni<br />
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© 2012 Monica P. Castaneda<br />
<a href="http://www.fengshuiforus.com/">www.fengshuiforus.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.monilife.com/">www.monilife.com</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-46337012697777289702012-07-08T18:08:00.001-04:002012-07-08T18:08:37.951-04:00Living a Life of Freedom and BalanceI am a fan of Ted Talks, and now that they are available on Netflix, I try to spend at least a half an hour a day learning something new through these videos.<br />
<br />
I recently watched a video on success by <span class="episodeTitle">Alain de Botton: <a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/alain_de_botton_a_kinder_gentler_philosophy_of_success.html" target="_blank">A Kinder, Gentler Philosophy of Success</a>.</span><br />
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<span class="episodeTitle">I enjoyed this video very much, and agreed with much of it. At some point, Alain made a comment along the lines of how, whenever we choose something in which we want to succeed, we are at the same time choosing to neglect something else. While I can see truth in this statement, I also have a different perspective, from my practice of Feng Shui. </span><br />
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<span class="episodeTitle">Feng Shui identifies Nine general Areas of Life:</span><br />
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<li><b><span style="color: #000055; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Career, Life Mission and Individuality</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #ff6699; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Marriage, Relationships and Partnerships</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #008800; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Health, Family and Community</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #990099; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Wealth, Prosperity and Self Worth</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #ff9900; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Center of Good Fortune and Gratitude</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #777777; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Spirituality, Helpful People and Travel</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Children, Creativity and Fun</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #339999; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Wisdom, Self Knowledge and Calm</span></b>
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<li><b><span style="color: #ee0000; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Fame, Reputation and Social Life</span></b>
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</ol>
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<span class="progress"><span class="mini-progress-bar" title="14 of 16 mins watched"><span class="bar p-75 cue-false"></span></span></span><span class="duration"></span><a class="btn btn-20 watchlk btn-play btn-def " data-vid="" href="http://movies.netflix.com/WiPlayer?movieid=70228641&trkid=3325854" id="m70228641_0"><br /></a><span class="episodeTitle">All of the above Life Areas have to be tended to for a person to be truly happy, prosperous and free. However, not all these life areas have the same importance during all of the stages of our lives.</span><br />
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<span class="episodeTitle">Moreover, if we dedicated the same amount of energy and time to each of these life areas at any given point in our lives, we would end up with a very unbalanced life. To give you an example, consider life area number 3: Health, Family and Community. This is a life area that you have to tend to every day, and devote at least a few hours every day to prepare/eat wholesome meals, walk or exercise a few times every week, and attend your church, clubs or organizations at least once a month to feel connected to a community. Now compare that to life area number 7: Children, Creativity and Entertainment. This is a life area that depending on the circumstances and stage in your life may take over most of your day (e.g. taking care of a baby or toddler), or just need a couple of hours a week to satisfy your need for fun or entertainment at a movie theater. Of course, ideally, you would be able to make time every day to nurture your creativity and to have fun, but these may not be realistic at certain points in our lives, say, for example, while going through a graduate program or during the first few years of a career.</span><br />
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<span class="episodeTitle">The dilemma is: how to know how much time and energy need to be devoted every day to each life area in order to live a balanced life?</span><br />
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<span class="episodeTitle">I don't believe there is an intellectual answer to this question. Whenever we try to give intellectual answers to the bigger questions of life we fall into the temptation of assuming that life can be lived based on recipes, instead of feeling the authenticity of each moment. I believe, however that there is an intuitive answer to this dilemma, an "inner knowing," so to speak.</span><br />
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<span class="episodeTitle">For this reason, when Florida healer and artist Bill Austin and I were working on the Feng Shui Healing Book Feng Shui Cures for the Life Areas https://www.createspace.com/3464762, I asked him to create a piece of his vibrational healing art devoted to this subject. Then I placed his abstract art into the shape of a wheel. The life areas, when used in Feng Shui, are placed in an arrangement that resembles a wheel, called the bagua. I call this wheel, the Wheel of Life Areas. Below you can see an image of the Wheel of Life Areas. If you click on the image you can check out the various products available with this image:</span><br />
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<a href="http://www.cafepress.com/fengshuicures/9110731" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://i1.cpcache.com/product/666173246/wheel_of_life_areas_cork_coaster.jpg?color=White" width="320" /></a></div>
<span class="episodeTitle">Please visit our CafePress store <a href="http://www.cafepress.com/fengshuicures/9110731" target="_blank">Feng Shui Cures</a> to explore 6 different products you might get for your home or office that contain this image, to assist you in your sincere intent to live a balanced and happy life.</span><br />
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<span class="ebob-arrow transp nse" style="top: 73px;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-29681802066830761832012-07-05T15:33:00.000-04:002012-07-06T08:28:19.382-04:00Are You Truly Free?Freedom is defined as "the capacity to perform choice, and not being under the domination or control of another; not being bound or enslaved."<br />
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I was born in what some call the Third World, in a little country called Ecuador, about the size of the state of Colorado. There, I never experienced anything but freedom.<br />
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When I was very young my father was a great admirer of the United States of America and tried to follow their lead. When I was a pre-teen my father started studying Sociology at the University and became enamored with Marxist theory, which came with a deep hatred of the United States.<br />
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My perception of the United States came to me, not through my parents beliefs, but by what I saw in movies and TV series, and by what people who had lived in the US told me. As a teen, I thought the USA was full of libertine people, who practiced free sex anywhere (like in "Dynasty") knew nothing of loyalty and murdered each other routinely.<br />
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As a young woman, I watched the news and read newspapers and became acquainted with US foreign policy. I couldn't help notice that the US always used freedom as a supporting philosophy of all their actions, but adapted the definition of freedom to the situation. For example, they opposed Castro's government in Cuba based on the fact that it wasn't a democratic government, while vigorously supporting Pinochet in Chile, one of the most vicious dictatorships in the modern history of the planet.<br />
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When I first moved to the United States I thought to myself, "<i>This</i> is the country of freedom?" I looked around and all I saw was people working too hard, sometimes two or three jobs, to make ends meet, or to fit a standard of living that they had not chosen themselves, but which had been suggested to them by the media. <br />
<br />
I saw people who had the freedom to get credit cards, to then have to pay liberal amounts of interest. I met women who chose to go to work, even though they had the freedom to stay home, because their neighborhoods were desolate during the day and there was no one with whom to interact. <br />
<br />
I mostly saw people who were good and lived by a set of decent morals and values – nothing like the people in most US TV series or movies -- caring people, with good intentions, willing and ready to offer help. I was surprised to see so much natural beauty and so many people with such a strong interest in the environment.<br />
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I now realize that compared to some countries in Africa and the Middle East, the US is really a haven for freedom. Compared to Latin American countries, I am not so sure. As I write this, I am aware that my perspective comes from living a life of privilege, and not a life of poverty, in South America. <br />
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The only freedom I saw in the US that I didn't already have in my native
Ecuador, was the freedom to publicly criticize or even make fun of the president of
the country without getting in immediate trouble. But what good is freedom of speech when you don't have time to exercise your freedom of thought?<br />
<br />
We need to make time in our busy lives to enjoy our blessings, including our freedom. If we feel we desperately need a vacation, maybe it is time to make some changes to our daily lifestyle.<br />
<br />
These are some of the best resources I have found to make significant changes in the way we live, which is a direct result from our daily choices:<br />
<br />
• The Simplicity Movement - especially the book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Circle-Simplicity-Return-Good-Life/dp/0060928727" target="_blank"><i>Circles of Simplicity</i></a> by Cecile Andrews, which is basically a manual to simplify your life in order to live your passions, while at the same time building friendships and stronger communities. <br />
<br />
• The book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Making-Room-Life-Lifestyles-Relationships/dp/0310250161/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1341515706&sr=1-1&keywords=making+room+for+life" target="_blank">M<i>aking Room for Life</i></a> by Randy Frazee.<br />
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Our family has made choices that baffle some of the people who know us. I started saving money four years before I got pregnant to get the equipment that would enable me to work from home and stay with the children. We homeschool. My husband left a job managing a Chiropractic practice for a large corporation to open a home based practice, so he can be close to us and not miss the children growing up. In some ways, we have traded income for time, and our wealth, happiness and quality of life have increased. <br />
<br />
I invite you to explore ways in which your own life might be simplified. I invite you to live a life that responds to your own values and standards and not to what other people have led you to believe will make you happy.<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-86509968683256727652011-12-05T16:45:00.001-05:002011-12-05T16:56:06.030-05:00Lecture series on Feng Shui, Affirmations, Wealth<div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">
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I recently gave a series of four lectures on the Feng Shui perspective on Affirmations, Manifesting and Wealth at the Positive Living Center of Knoxville (formerly known as Religious Science Church of Knoxville). I have embedded the videos below:<b><br /></b></div>
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<b>1. The Feng Shui Home as a Positive Feedback Loop for Your Affirmations</b></div>
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<b>2. Getting Through the Dark Night of the Soul with the Help of the Home.</b></div>
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The “dark night of the soul” is a metaphor used to describe a phase in a person’s spiritual life, marked by a sense of loneliness and desolation. Moni Castaneda talks about how using your home as a healing tool can help you get through this and other hard moments in life.</div>
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3. The Feng Shui Gratitude Box</b><br />
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<b>4. Wealth and Spirituality and the Use of the Wealth Poster</b></div>
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-58719705999927863112011-07-27T22:48:00.001-04:002011-12-12T12:55:55.857-05:00Zumba - Hot Latin Guys... for Inspiration<div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">
As it gets colder, we all need some inspiration to get through the cold winter days.<br />
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I thought I'd share my favorite Hot Latin Guys with you.</div>
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(Make sure to check out my favorite Hot Latin Guy at the bottom of this post, then tell me who is your favorite Hot Latin Guy) </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hot Latin Guy #7: Chayanne</b></span></div>
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(Not my type but a lot of ladies like him) </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hot Latin Guy #6: Ricky Martin </b></span><br />
(sure he is gay, so what? He is still hot) </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hot Latin Guy #5: Marc Anthony </b></span></div>
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(not handsome, but such a sensual voice!)</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Hot Latin Guy #4: David Bisbal </span></b></div>
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(has that Spanish bravado)</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Hot Latin Guy #3: Juanes </span></b></div>
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Colombian singer/songwriter</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hot Latin Guy #2: Carlos Vives</b></span></div>
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This is also my favorite Zumba song:</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hot Latin Guy #1: Marco E. Castaneda</b></span></div>
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The Hottest Latin Guy: The one that shows up, and stays through thin and thick, who changed diapers and bathed babies, and whom my children call Dada: Dr. C. (Really hot too, but he wouldn't let me take a pic of him without his shirt on). Today, December 8th of 2011 is our 17 Year Wedding Anniversary!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim-QO7b7OOKxq6JPqR2L9OoUhDsMChVP93KvkB-JmDHqqaFsJOMIPmnNfDUtIUlelNOrUBBW7TCjOo8v6NyERaODcDQ_TPs514tpbmK4EwjfsJxwi68eKXzrxFnJiJt7IzqSihFFOse2s/s1600/MarcowAwanwZaffar.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="145" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim-QO7b7OOKxq6JPqR2L9OoUhDsMChVP93KvkB-JmDHqqaFsJOMIPmnNfDUtIUlelNOrUBBW7TCjOo8v6NyERaODcDQ_TPs514tpbmK4EwjfsJxwi68eKXzrxFnJiJt7IzqSihFFOse2s/s320/MarcowAwanwZaffar.png" width="320" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-34311526048684004792011-07-23T12:37:00.000-04:002011-07-23T13:28:16.015-04:00To My Friends<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">In Latin culture there is a devotion to friendship. There is a moment, in really good parties, when you are tired of dancing, that someone takes out a guitar and we sing songs about friendship.<b><i> </i></b></div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b><i>Friends and no one else. The rest: a jungle.</i> Jorge Guillén, Spanish Poet</b></div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: purple; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><b>Translation to English of the song <span style="font-size: large;">"A Mis Amigos."</span> (To My Friends) by Alberto Cortez, sung by Facundo Cabral and Alberto Cortez</b></div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">You can watch/listen to this song at the bottom of this post.</div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I am indebted to my friends for their tenderness and their words of encouragement and the hugs... and splitting the bill which life presents us - step by step - with all of them. </div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I am indebted to my friends for their patience in tolerating the sharpest thorns, the bursts of temper, the negligence, the vanities, the fears and the doubts.</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><i>Sometimes friendship seems like a fragile paper boat, but the most violent storm can't destroy it, because on that paper boat, as captain and steersman, holds on to the steering wheel... a heart, a heart, my heart.<br />
</i></div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><i>(the heart of [names of friends], the heart of a friend I call master, because every time I talk with him I learn four or five words I didn't know before.) </i></div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I am indebted to my friends for the annoyances that have disturbed some times our harmony. We all know it can't be a sin, to sometimes argue about small things. </div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">To my friends I will leave, when I die, the legacy of my devotion on a note of my guitar and, among the forgotten verses of a poem, my poor incorrigible soul of a cicada.</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><i>Sometimes friendship seems like a fragile paper boat, but the most violent storm can't destroy it, because on that paper boat, as captain and steersman, holds on to the steering wheel... a heart, a heart, my heart.</i></div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"></div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">My friend, if this song, like the wind, wherever you want to listen to it, speaks to you, you will be a plural, because feelings are not exhibited when friends are carried in the soul.</div><div style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
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</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-32751330590415546682011-07-13T16:52:00.000-04:002011-07-15T22:00:47.291-04:00Facundo Cabral and the Love of LifeI asked my eight year old son not long ago, while we were lying down on the grass enjoying the sunshine, to tell me something about the world. He said, "OK," thought for five seconds, then said, <b>"the world is peaceful, graceful, and beautiful."</b> This comes of course from the child who, when he and his brother were asked what they think Heaven is like, described their current life. (We must be doing something right.)<br />
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My son's statement about the world is a lot truer than what the media shows in what we call "the news." I don't usually watch the news. When I was younger I believed I should watch the news to be informed about what was going on in the world, but it didn't take long for me to notice that watching the news was just a way to be informed about all the bad things that happen in the world, collected and put together to make it seem like the world is a terrible place. The truth is most of the world is at peace and free of tragedy most of the time, the larger part of the world is like my son Awan says, "peaceful, graceful and beautiful" – even in the Third World, where I was born.<br />
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I don't watch the news, but I also don't want to be the only person at a meeting who doesn't know about some major world event that just happened, so sometimes I watch the muted headliners that the Spanish channel shows during the night time soap opera (yes, I confess to watching soap operas).<br />
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It was through the headline briefs that I learned of the death of Facundo Cabral, a beloved Latin American singer, songwriter and poet. To describe the shock and pain of this discovery, of what the tragic death of this singer means to the Latin world, the only thing I can think of is to compare it to what people in the US felt when they learned about the untimely death of princess Diana.<br />
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Facundo Cabral agreed with me and my son that the world is beautiful, in spite of all the strife, and Cabral knew a lot about strife.<br />
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He was the seventh child of a very poor family in Argentina. His father abandoned the family a day after his birth. He said in interviews that at the age of nine he stopped the official vehicle of then-President Juan Domingo Peron and his wife, Evita, to ask for work for his mother, Sara. Eva Duarte, Argentina's first lady is quoted as saying that was the first decent thing she had heard that day. Everyone else was asking for charity, but Cabral had asked for work. This meeting led to the family moving to the city of Tandil, Cabral worked on a farm and had his first exposure to Argentinean folk music but also to alcohol and criminal activity.<br />
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Facundo said he was an alcoholic by age nine and up to no good in the streets, until he became a thief and was sent to a reformatory, at age fourteen, due to an act of violence. It was in this reformatory that he met a Jesuit priest who taught him to read and write and introduced him to classic literature. In three years, Cabral completed the equivalents to elementary, middle school and high school.<br />
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Cabral said that as a teen he had an encounter with a vagabond named Simon, who introduced him to religion and encouraged him to seek a career in music. <br />
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As a young man Facundo got a job playing an a hotel in a coastal city in Argentina. He had moderate success until he composed his most famous song: "No soy de aquí ni soy de allá" (<b><i>I am not from here and I am not from there</i></b>"translated at the bottom of this post)<br />
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Cabral found the love of his life and got married at forty, but both his wife and one year old daughter died in a plane crash a few years later. Cabral, devastated, went to meet Mother Theresa. He related that when she saw him she told him, "I know what your problem is" to which he thought that everybody knew what his problem was and that the world was a mess. She then continued, <b>"Your problem is that you don't know where to put your love. You have so much of it, and now you don't know where to put it."</b> This led to Cabral moving to Calcutta for a while to help Mother Teresa tend to people suffering from leprosy.<br />
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Cabral never remarried, devoting his life to his music. He wrote 66 books. On July 9 of 2011 Facundo Cabral was murdered while driving to the airport in Guatemala, where he had given a concert the night before. The target, some news services say, may have been his Nicaraguan promoter. He was 74 years old when he died.<br />
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For someone with his history it is amazing to read some of his quotes or to listen to the lyrics of his songs. Here are some examples:<br />
<ul><li>"Every morning is good news, every child that is born is good news, every just man is good news, every singer is good news, because every singer is one less soldier."<br />
</li>
<li>"I'm amazed to form part of this amazing universe and I'm proud of the hunger that keeps me awake. Because when man is full he falls asleep."<br />
</li>
<li> I always ask God, why did you give me so much? You gave me misery, hunger, happiness, struggle, lights... I saw everything. I know there is cancer, syphilis and spring, and apple fritters..<br />
</li>
<li> ...You think you lost something – it is not true, everything was given to you... You have lost no one -- those you loved who have passed on, are just ahead of you, and wait for you when your time comes.</li>
</ul>The last quote is from his musical poem <i><b>You are not depressed, only distracted, </b></i>which you can listen to or read below:<i><b><br />
</b></i><br />
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<i><b>I AM NOT HERE AND NOT FROM THERE (translated lyrics)</b></i><br />
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<i>I like to walk, but I don't follow the paths, what is for sure is already devoid of mystery. I like to go very far in the summer, but go back to my mother in the winter, and see the dogs who never forgot me, and get the hugs I receive from my brothers. I like that, I like that.</i><br />
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<i>Of course I like that.</i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>I like the sunshine, Alice and doves, good cigars and the Spanish guitar, jumping walls and opening windows, and girls in April.</i><br />
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</i><br />
<i>I like wine as much as flowers, and rabbits, but not tractors, home made bread and the voice of Dolores, and the sea wetting my feet.</i><br />
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</i><br />
<i>I am not from here and I am not from there, I have no age, or future, and being happy is the color of my identity.</i><br />
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</i><br />
<i>I love to lie down always on the sand, or chase Manuela on my bike, or having all the time in the world to watch the stars while lying down with Maria on the wheat fields.</i><br />
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<i>I am not from here and I am not from there, I have no age, or future, and being happy is the color of my identity.</i><br />
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</div><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/NSHwX2nyKoQ?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-9729931974621360862010-12-02T09:51:00.000-05:002010-12-02T16:59:45.690-05:00Are you a Christian? And what does Yoga have to do with it.<b>Are you a Christian?</b><br />
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This is a question my family and I are often confronted with living in Knoxville, TN, what some call the “buckle of the Bible belt.”<br />
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It is also a question to which -- however I answer -- sometimes I am telling the truth and I am also at the same time lying. <br />
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Four years ago, when we were new in town, I was dumbfounded when a teenager at a doctor’s waiting room was immediately attracted to our family and came to play with the boys, then about 4 and 2, but caught herself and asked, “Wait – are you Christians?” I told her we were and she immediately relaxed and continued to be cute with them. I couldn’t help wonder what she would have done if I had said no. Would she have turned around and gone back to her chair and ignored us for the rest of the time? Perhaps she would have tried to sit next to me and share “the Good News.”<br />
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About two years ago I had taken the boys to a play date at a water park in Powell. When the play date was over, our friends left a few minutes before us. An attractive young woman dressed in a nice sweater and a long skirt approached me with a smile. I smiled back. You see, where I grew up and in the two communities in the United States where I have lived (the Mississippi Gulf Coast and Davenport, IA) such an attire is often a sign of an open mind. Come to find out, in Tennessee, it often is a sign of belonging to a fundamentalist church where wearing pants or showing one’s calves are considered sins. <br />
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Soon after the conversation started I could tell she was a fanatic and started hurrying up picking up our things so we could leave. When she asked me if I was a Christian, this time I told her no, grabbed the children’s hands and started walking towards the parking lot. She followed us to the car, leaving her own children unsupervised in the playground, and tried to push pamphlets into my hands, while she asked one question after another, without giving me a chance to answer: Do you believe in God? Do you believe Jesus is God? Do your believe Jesus died in the cross for your sins? and on and on. Once I had the boys safely buckled in the car I told her to step back and leave us alone in no uncertain terms. <br />
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<b>So why did I answer “yes” to the same question four years ago and “no” a couple of years ago?</b><br />
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This is why: all my life I have believed that a Christian is a follower of Jesus, someone who agrees with the teachings of Jesus and does their best to live their life according to them. In this sense I have always been a Christian. In this sense many of the people I know who would not define themselves as Christians, really are Christians. In this sense, some of the people we have met in East Tennessee who claim to be Christians, really are not – they spread fear instead of love. Below is an example.<br />
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My husband, a chiropractor, had some lettering added to the back window of his car. It had the name of his practice, “Genesis Chiropractic,” the phone number and website and in Spanish “El Dr. Habla Español” (The Doctor Speaks Spanish). One day he had gone to the East side of town to pick up something and was coming back home the back way. Close to the Mall Center he noticed a car seemed to be following him. This went on for about twenty minutes, all the way to our home. An irate woman parked on our driveway, right behind his car. She got out and started screaming at him. First, of course, she asked him if he was a Christian, to which he answered “yes.” She made a comment as to wanting to make sure he had the right to call his practice Genesis. Then she asked if he knew what he was doing with a message in Spanish: encouraging illegal immigrants to come to this country to take away the jobs from good American citizens who were Christian and law abiding. She said immigrants are criminals infested with illnesses that they are bringing to the US. Didn’t he read the news about Mexicans bringing leprosy into California? Her rage seemed to be focused on Hispanics. She must not have noticed my husband is Hispanic himself – he has a lighter complexion than most Latin people and, being born in the US, he has no accent.<br />
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There was also the family in Halls who defined themselves as our “best friends” but stopped talking to us when they learned that the church we attended (TVUUC) welcomed gay people. Or the man at the gym that never greeted us again after we had a conversation about liberal Christianity.<br />
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Soon after we moved to Knoxville we learned the definition of “Christian” here can encompass many things, and that unfortunately often those who define themselves as Christians are people who affirm to take the Bible literally, yet focus only on passages that, artfully taken out of context, seem to support their world view, which is extremely right wing, misogynistic and racist. These people may say that they believe in Jesus Christ, but their behavior is far removed from the teachings of Jesus. <br />
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So this is why when people in East Tennessee ask me if I am a Christian, there is no easy answer to this question. If I say that I am a Christian – will the person assume that I am a judgmental person whose only motivation to try to be good is the fear of hell? Or someone who justifies their lack of goodness in the fact that they only have “to believe” in order to be saved?<br />
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If I say I am not a Christian, will the other person assume that I do not believe in or follow the teachings of Jesus?<br />
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I feel at this point I should make a distinction between fundamentalist and evangelical. We have very good friends who are evangelical Christians. My own grandmother and a couple of my aunts ditched the traditional religion of Latin Americans, Catholicism, for evangelical Christianity. We respect each other’s views and guide our relationships from our hearts. They do not feel a need to impose their particular set of beliefs on us and are open to different views of the world. <br />
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You are probably wondering as to the word <b>yoga</b> in the title of this blog and where it comes in. <br />
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I have actually found a formula to figure out if there is potential for friendship with someone who defines themselves as a Christian in East Tennessee: I ask them how they feel about yoga. <br />
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If they tell me yoga is dangerous because it opens up the mind for sin, or that it comes from the devil, I know that it is very unlikely this person can build a friendship with us. As soon as they learn I do Feng Shui and Reiki, they would run the other way, or worse, try to “convert” me.<br />
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If the person is OK with yoga, I can tell they are open minded to goodness and wisdom that comes from other cultures and even other religions. This is a good sign. <br />
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Recently I was delighted to see the new billboards for an international Christian health and fitness organization, displaying a woman doing a yoga pose, in an area where some pastors are telling their congregations that if they do yoga they will go to hell. This gives me hope.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-47873253216222520082010-11-21T15:50:00.000-05:002010-11-21T15:52:16.804-05:00What a Decade of Practicing Feng Shui has Taught Me About Relationships (2)In a previous post I talked about how the accumulated tension in a love relationships always looks for an outlet, and how this outlet can be healthy, or unhealthy.<br />
<a href="http://advisormonica.blogspot.com/2010/11/what-decade-of-practicing-feng-shui-has.html">http://advisormonica.blogspot.com/2010/11/what-decade-of-practicing-feng-shui-has.html</a><br />
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In this post I am going to share with you what are some features in a couple's home that alert me to the presence of accumulated tension. I call these "argument breeders." These are sources of mild irritation, some of them also indicate that one or the two partners have "dropped the ball:"<br />
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<b>1. An entryway or hallway that is too narrow or constricted.</b><br />
These are places for potential collisions. If two people are trying to leave in a hurry at the same time there can be competition for the space available.<br />
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<b>2. Doors that open against one another so that their door knobs hit each other. </b><br />
These produce annoying sounds and vibrations, they are also a symbol of clashing personalities and of competition between the partners.<br />
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<b>3. Doors that squeak. </b><br />
Again, these produce annoying noises. It also shows neither partner is taking the responsibility to fix this very easy to solve problem. Is this attitude also apparent in other aspect of their lives?<br />
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<b>4. Drawers that get stuck, are too full or do not close properly. </b><br />
Mild causes of irritation on a good day. The day one partner is suffering from a migraine, that may be the day that drawer ends up broken on the floor.<br />
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<b>5. In the kitchen, having the stove exactly opposite the sink, or being right next to it. </b><br />
This is considered in Feng Shui an element conflict between fire and water. Water puts out fire. Symbolically this translates into the couple trying to put out each others ideas and dreams.<br />
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<b>6. Furniture with sharp edges where people get hurt when they aren't paying attention.</b><br />
If a couple allows furniture that is potentially dangerous in their home, what else might they be allowing that is not healthy for their relationship?<br />
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<b>7. Artwork with violent themes or content</b>, this includes abstract art when the lines are too chaotic or form sharp angles.<br />
These create an ambiance of danger for the unconscious mind, and keep people "on guard."<br />
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<b>8. Cabinet doors, closet doors and drawers that are left opened, toilet lid not put down.</b><br />
Cabinet doors or drawers left open are potential hazards. The toilet lid up shows lack of respect for the female side of the relationship.<br />
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<b>9. Too much white (metal) or green (wood, tree)</b> in the master bedroom, but even more so green and white combinations. These colors are symbolic of the elements that hurt or weaken the earth element, which is essential for healthy relationships (these elements are wood and metal), and therefore should be avoided in the bedroom.<br />
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<b>10. Excessive clutter produced or retained by only one of the partners. </b><br />
This can be a sign that only one partner continues to work on his or her own issues, while the other one refuses to let go of the past or to confront their inner conflicts.<br />
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<b>How Feng Shui Helps</b><br />
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Feng Shui helps, first and foremost, by pointing out these kinds of issues to the couple and bringing them to their awareness. The recognition that a problem exists is the first step to solve that problem. Then, Feng Shui can help you make small changes in your home that reflect the changes you want to see in your life. When changes happen in the physical environment, change becomes easier in the emotional and mental realms.<br />
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For more information on argument breeders and what to do about them, please visit my Feng Shui website:<br />
<a href="http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/FengShuiJourneys.html#Anchor-TWO-47857">http://www.fengshuiforus.com/Pages/FengShuiJourneys.html#Anchor-TWO-47857</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-41655584174251139502010-11-21T14:42:00.000-05:002010-11-21T14:42:59.739-05:00What a Decade of Practicing Feng Shui has Taught Me About Relationships (1)Feng Shui is one of the most effective tools to "diagnose" increasing stress in a love relationship. It also offers easy to implement ways to improve a relationship by focusing in the environment where that relationship develops (usually the master bedroom).<br />
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Over a decade of assisting couples with relationship issues through Feng Shui, I have observed that many problems in a love relationship have their root in the personal baggage that each individual brings to the table. When these issues are not addressed the relationship becomes dysfunctional. The severity of this dysfunction depends on how serious the baggage is and how close the couple has become in their years together.<br />
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Dysfunction creates tension. Tension builds up. <b>All tension at some point will have to find an outlet.</b><br />
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<b>Healthy outlets would include a discussion, an argument, or the decision to seek help, as in couple's therapy or Feng Shui. </b>Another healthy outlet could be going on a trip together and removing themselves from their usual environment so they can relate at another level, which may rebuild trust and love so they can better handle their issues when they come home. Some couples choose a common cause, goal or hobby, so that the rising tension is channeled into a constructive activity they share. This working together, shoulder to shoulder, can be very beneficial for a relationship. <br />
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<b>Unhealthy outlets would include: having an affair, pouring excessive attention in work, children, or volunteering. Another unhealthy outlet is abuse, either verbal or physical.</b><br />
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<b>The cycle of abuse</b> gives a couple, in a very weird unhealthy way, an excuse to stay together. The abusive person lets out steam by exhibiting aggression to its victim, then the victim has to deal with the immediate effects of the trauma. Things get so bad that when they come back to their "normal" situation there is a feeling of relief and with it comes the hope for improvement. Thus I have seen abusive relationships pass the test of time, while other much healthier couples dissolved.<br />
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<b>Having an affair</b> is a strange but effective way to "resolve" the tension. As modern women we may cringe at this thought today, but think a few generations back: it was not uncommon in marriages for the man to take up a lover and for the woman to pour all her attention on the children or her church. With their tension released elsewhere, they became free to be civil to each other in their limited time together. These were considered successful marriages for their time. This was a <b>patriarchal</b> way to resolve a marriage. Today, of course, we know that these were unhealthy, neurotic arrangements.<br />
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<div style="color: #cc0000;"><b>The truth is people cannot stand unhappiness for extended periods of time, sooner or later, something has got to give. </b></div><br />
I have seen couples "resolve" their unhappiness by <b>psomatizing</b>. Psomatization is the process by which stress and other negative emotions go to the body and produce illness or dis-ease. Sometimes the internal process the two people go through while experiencing an illness in either of them can be healing for their soul -- sometimes. Other times it simply becomes an excuse to not confront the life issues they need to face up to. <br />
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For example, I knew a couple in which the man was 20 years older than the woman. They struggled with intimacy because his libido was very low and he also had some erectile dysfunction. They tried several methods, including Viagra, but it soon became evident that his problem was not physical but had its source in deep seated negative beliefs about sexuality and -- the wife suspected -- possibly some sexual trauma experienced during childhood that he was unwilling to confront. This would have been the time to go into therapy, however around this time he went in for his medical checkup and was diagnosed with an illness. This led to many more doctor's visits and tests and major adjustments in their diet. This couple put all their energy in "fighting the disease" and this gave them a common goal. Their problems in the bedroom all of a sudden took a second place in their list of priorities. It also gave them an "explanation" for what was going on -- perhaps the erectile dysfunction was simply a consequence of the illness and not a reflection of dis-ease in their relationship. <br />
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<b>If you do not address the conflicts in your relationship they will sooner or later find their own outlet:</b> will it be an affair, getting married to a job, an addiction? Or maybe an illness... <b style="color: blue;">You can choose better. </b><br />
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Feng Shui is a mild, non-aggressive way to address the stress in a love relationship.<br />
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Working on the home together, from remodeling or building projects to decorating a room or choosing a new piece of furniture can be extremely beneficial to a couple.<br />
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In a future installment, we will explore more about Feng Shui and relationships.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-29202839783633925532010-09-28T11:47:00.000-04:002012-07-21T19:03:06.052-04:00Are You Still Affected by That?It was probably a year ago that I lost a friend. I had actually lost her months earlier, but it was about a year ago that I noticed. <br />
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One year ago I was trying to figure out why I was having trouble communicating with this woman who had been my friend for seventeen years. Searching my soul and my memory, I contacted the exact moment when I felt I could simply no longer connect at a heart level with this person. It was the moment when she asked me, over the phone, “Are you still affected by that?”<br />
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You see, a little over two years ago a terrible tragedy happened at the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church in Knoxville, Tennessee. A man by the unremarkable name of Jim Adkisson entered the church with a shotgun and opened fire in the sanctuary, during a children’s play. <br />
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My family and I were delayed that day, so we pulled into the parking lot right behind the first cop arriving at the scene. Thankfully, we were spared the sight of the event that torn apart the lives of so many in our community. <br />
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This happened on July 27 of 2008 and I had talked about this with my friend several times in the months past. This former friend lives in Ecuador, where I was born and raised, but she is from another country. When she first arrived in Ecuador she got married and then divorced about seven years later. She had a baby, whom I adored. During the end of her marriage I often stopped by at her place to help her out with the baby, and keep her company. When I got married, she organized a party for me and baked me a quinoa wedding cake. A few months later, I moved to the United States. <br />
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For fourteen years we kept the long distance friendship strong. On December of 2008 she married a man she loves. In Ecuador what counts from the legal standpoint is what is called the “civil” marriage, which is the legal contract that starts a marriage, and after that people are free to hold a religious ceremony of any faith if they wish, but priests and ministers are not allowed to hold wedding ceremonies unless the couple can present the “civil” marriage certificate.<br />
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She believes in astrology and numerology and she thinks some dates have special meaning over others, so she had chosen the Winter Solstice for her “civil” ceremony and she told me over the phone and in an email that she was having the religious ceremony on the Spring Equinox. However, she never sent me an official wedding announcement or an invitation. <br />
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Towards the middle of March our lives and the lives of the people in my church community were shaken again by the release, after the court hearing, of the “suicide” letter that Jim Adkisson had left in his truck before he went in the church with a shotgun hidden in a guitar case. (He had expected that he would be killed by the police after he had killed as many people as he could.)<br />
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Jim Adkisson had decided to plead guilty to all counts to avoid the death penalty. During the hearing, knowing that church officials were seating behind him, he pretended to scratch the back of his head with his middle finger. He showed no remorse – his only regret being that he only got to kill two people and injure a few more. <br />
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During this time, I kept expecting to get a note or an email with the confirmation of the date for my friend’s religious ceremony, but the note never came. The Spring equinox came and went in the midst of volunteering in several church committees, organizing a free energy healing event for members and friends of the church, and providing support to friends through conversation and company. I also had to admit to myself that I would have to let go of a weekly class I’d been teaching, because I could not concentrate enough to take care of all the logistics involved with the advertising and planning of the new cycle. I would also sometimes forget what I was saying in the middle of a sentence – and that didn’t bode well for lectures. <br />
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By the end of May there was a message in my inbox, with some beautiful photos of her wedding... accompanied by an angry note of how hurt she was and how disappointed she was on me as a friend that I didn’t sent her a congratulatory note for her wedding. <br />
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I immediately called her on the phone and apologized (though looking back I am not sure an apology was needed) and tried to explain to her what had been going on here with the hearing and all the sadness at the church. That is when she asked: “Are you still affected by that?” It had only been eight months from the shooting, it was such an unexpected question. After that I don’t remember anything else that was said, only that I felt something close in my heart towards her. <br />
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Because I valued this friendship and didn’t want to stay with my heart closed to her, I wrote her an email about how I felt, that she should ask such an insensitive question. Weeks went by and she didn’t answer my email but one day she found me online and instant-messaged me. During this chat I asked her why she had asked that question: “are you still affected by that?” like she was talking about a fender bender that had happened 20 years ago. <br />
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Her response was that she didn’t expect me to call her and she spoke without thinking because she still was so hurt that I wasn’t with her in spirit on her wedding day (for which she sent no announcement). <br />
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This woman, who holds a doctorate in psychology and has a successful private practice as a therapist, continued on to say that I shouldn’t be as affected as I said I was by the events of July 27, because “I wasn’t even there when it happened.” In her infinite knowledge and wisdom she added that the bulk of any grieving, anyway, is done on the first six months.<br />
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When I insisted that I felt offended by her question, she added, irritably, “I already told you I spoke without thinking.”<br />
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I could tell that she was still feeling very resentful so I tried to tell her about the aftermath of the tragedy, because you see, Jim Adkisson didn’t just kill two people and hurt another seven. <br />
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Several of our church elders passed on in the weeks following this event. Our pastor had to hold six funerals in less than two weeks. I tried to tell her about the people who still have pellets in their bodies, about my friend’s father who lost an eye and now struggles with depression, about the heart attacks and the recurrences of cancer, the high incidence of illnesses and surgeries that followed the tragedy.... the young people who had nervous breakdowns and had to quit their jobs, those who were not able to get re-employed and ended up having to file for disability... the people who never struggled with weight issues before this, who are now battling obesity... the beautiful couples that are now divorced... and the sorrows that hurt so deep we can’t even talk about them. I tried to tell her so many things, but she only waited for a pause so she could say “you were self-centered.”<br />
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I had to tell her that to say the things she was saying meant she didn’t really understand the magnitude of what had happened here. She insisted she did. Then I asked her if she would have posed that question to the people who were at Columbine or Virginia Tech... she didn’t know what to say. <br />
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That was the moment I knew this friendship was over. It was over because this former friend could not understand the most important thing about me in relationship with the events of July 27 of 2008, and which is: <b>I do not want to not be affected by that – because it happened, and it matters.</b><br />
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It matters because people I loved are no longer around us. It matters because I had to explain to my children what guns and murderers are much sooner than I had wanted to. It matters because we had to adjust own beliefs about evil, and this has influenced the way we live today. <br />
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It matters, because the shooting originated a cascade of events that changed the future, not only of this church, but of the whole Unitarian Universalist Denomination – evidenced by the creation of “Standing on the Side of Love,” a new and very powerful social justice campaign. <br />
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It mattered to me and my family in another unexpected way: with the new concerns about safety, all the wonderful “extracurricular” activities that were available for families at the church had to be dropped until they could be offered again under new safety standards. For our family, as Hispanics living in the buckle of the Bible belt, with no extended family in the area, this meant going back to the feelings of isolation we had felt when we first moved to the area.<br />
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It has been a long haul for our family to find a sense of community in East Tennessee, without the support of the church. There has been a good side to this too: we have found friendships in some very unexpected places. <br />
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Today, though we feel blessed in many ways, I cannot help mourn the loss of what was my church, TVUUC, before the shooting. <br />
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I know so many people I love still struggle every day with what happened in much deeper ways than have affected me and my family, and I wrote this for them, so they know it is OK to still be affected by that. We will always be affected by that – because it happened, and it matters. <br />
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You have a right to still be affected by that, and you also have the responsibility to take care of yourself; to take the necessary steps to get yourself back to wellness; and to ask for help if you need it... and do this until you find yourself feeling some days like you are no longer affected by it, while knowing that it has changed you forever.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4317986325309108922.post-45836557877419636262010-05-08T10:37:00.000-04:002011-12-11T10:36:14.407-05:00Feng Shui Happiness 101 - Dance!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi467Vs8_DPOOhjC5LP3esBuv7T_FrYtoOUBR7bRK4EqUnahq6Aibn_inNc_ePKGAvNPbOhVGttgAujkp0W0vzpMXYYlVWkjcFRyhyphenhyphen7cV6yMkV_WlSiTo5vU0gMTvUsyuJHKmXbwkmexKI/s1600/FridayNightParty.JPG"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5468928336814086130" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi467Vs8_DPOOhjC5LP3esBuv7T_FrYtoOUBR7bRK4EqUnahq6Aibn_inNc_ePKGAvNPbOhVGttgAujkp0W0vzpMXYYlVWkjcFRyhyphenhyphen7cV6yMkV_WlSiTo5vU0gMTvUsyuJHKmXbwkmexKI/s200/FridayNightParty.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold;">FENG SHUI HAPPINESS 101: How to Have a Friday Night Latin Party with Your Kids</span><br />
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A very important part of Feng Shui is to impregnate your home with happiness by promoting and creating happy moments. <br />
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Because I am Latin but my kids are being raised in the US and are not being exposed much to Latin culture, I make it a point to highlight for them the good things about my original culture.<br />
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Here is how to have an impromptu Latin party with your children. No props required except for Latin music and some fruit:<br />
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1. Play soft Latin music during dinner to set the mood. Eat a yummy delicious light dinner (so it doesn't affect your dancing). For you to have a Latin party there has to be dancing. If there is no dancing we call that a social gathering and not a party. :-)<br />
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2. Have a drink: a tropical fruit smoothie in a small glass or cup (2 to 4 oz.). Instead of "Cheers" say "Salud!"<br />
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3. Turn up the Latin music (Zumba music works really well).<br />
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4. Break the ice by doing some line dancing or making a choo choo dancing train where everyone participates.<br />
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5. Have another drink: a tropical fruit smoothie in a small glass or cup (2 to 4 oz.) This time don't say "Salud!" instead:<br />
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6. Yell: "Qué viva la fiesta!" Everyone else replies: "Qué viva!" (at least three times, get louder with each)<br />
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7. Now comes the time for free style dancing. Get loose, get wild. Show them that you know how to have a good time and encourage them to explore movement (never make fun of them)<br />
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8. Have another drink: a tropical fruit smoothie in a small glass or cup (2 to 4 oz.) Again yell: "Viva la fiesta!" Everyone else replies: "Que viva!" Then yell: "Qué viva ________!" insert everyone's name one at time. Everyone replies "Qué viva!" every time.<br />
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9. Make a circle and take turns going in the middle. Do your moves while everybody else cheers and applauds. Again yell: "Que viva _______!"<br />
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10. Now comes the time to go crazy. (Have another drink if you want, and include some pop songs if you wish) Let your creativity flow. Dance, jump, laugh. For the little ones you can have a plush animal dance demo.<br />
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11. Make some noise. Use your voice or a noise maker of your choice (optional). Our favorite are the flying rocket balloons.<br />
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12. End the evening by singing slow songs about happiness and friendship.<br />
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13. Go to sleep feeling happy, wake up feeling even happier: You have taught your kids how to get drunk on happiness.<br />
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14. For better results repeat every weekend.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03088612948826829074noreply@blogger.com1